Monday, July 31, 2006

Proof Positive Most MTV Viewers are Stupid.

Hollywood Rag lists the top 10 Videos that broke the rules, as voted on by viewers of MTV:

1. Madonna - Like A Prayer (1989)
2. Britney Spears - Baby One More Time (1999)
3. Michael Jackson - Thriller (1983)
4. Madonna - Ray of Light (1998)
5. Madonna - Vogue (1988)
6. Michael & Janet Jackson - Scream (1995)
7. Robbie Williams - Rock DJ (2000)
8. Eric Prydz - Call On Me (2004)
9. Jamiroquai - Virtual Insanity (1997)
10. Spice Girls - Wannabe (1996)

Some of these videos were truly groundbreaking and shocking. But a list that doesn't include Prodigy's "Smack My *itch Up" as something that broke the rules is messed up.

Who the heck is Eric Prydz?

NIN anyone? And why the he** are the Spice Girls on this list? Wannabe is not breaking the rules, shocking, or even inspired. It's stupid and almost as annoying as The Macarena. The only thing save it was that there is no dance associated with it.

Caption Contest Winner

And drum roll please... the winner of the dance caption contest is:

Ashley the Blue Raider with -

Woman: J-eyhs, I am a fox. I am so foxy I make yellow crime scene tape sexy. Kapow! (Jutting hip out)

Man: Whoa, who waxed the fl.. oh sh**!

She won even without Elena's lobbying.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

I got my dresses...

at 9:30 tonight. They look really good but the drama surrounding them made me just want to send them back to New Jersey where they came from.

And the glove for the latin dress is for the wrong hand. At least there is a spiffy bracelet I can wear. And wait til y'all see the hair. Elena said this is the hair I should have had for the former Miss O'Hara's wedding. I doubt Hurricane Katrina could have moved this hair. There is probably a new hole in the ozone for the amount of hairspray we used. It is very crunchy and thanks to the bobbypins, I will probably be sleeping sitting up.

Why am I not in bed right now when I have to be up in 5 hours? Well, I have my priorities... burning music on to the laptop so I can transfer it to the iPod, for example. And I'm hyped up on caffine right now. Wheeeeeeee!

If you are interested and have nothing better to do tomorrow, I will be dancing bright and early at 9am. Other events will be going on all day long. The professional dancers will be competing Friday night and Saturday night. That will be an amazing show. More info here - http://www.volstdancechallenge.com/

Just so you know...

My birthday is Thursday.

Monday, July 24, 2006

The Biggest Compliment vol. 2

This week has been all about the upcoming competition. Everything revolves around it. What I eat. What I'm wearing. Planning my evenings so that I can get my nails done, eyebrows done, hair done as well as practice.

Monday night I had another session with my coach. I was wearing my "got hips?" t-shirt because I was feeling particularly sassy, despite the major f*ck up with my dresses (that is a whole other blog post that will be completely dissing the company. As far as I am concerned, J'Ordy Dance Couture is now on the level of h.h. gregg in my book. I will NEVER shop there again. I will never recommend them to anyone. I plan on complaining to the powers that be at the studio, who brought that designer in.... but that's for another post).

After nearly crying because Todd says "I changed your entries because there was some overlap with you and another student (we are the same age and she's just a little bit more advanced, but not by much). I put you into the Peabody events."
"The what?"
"Oh, I've told you about it. We worked on it the other day, I just didn't tell you that's the dance we were working on. You'll be fine."
"What? How.. what? No. Not today. I can't get them to return my calls about the dresses as to when they are going to ship them, which leaves me in a MAJOR bind as to what I am going to wear on Thursday... now you are springing a dance on me I've never seen or done before? #)(*$# "
"Shut up."

So I did. I did fine. Probably more than fine. It's like the foxtrot but not as fast as the quick step (which is the foxtrot turned up to 12).

Anyway, after my experience with the Peabody, we went to other dances that I am more familar with, such as the Mambo. We were working on this spin when I caught David Hamiliton watching out of the corner of my eye. He was working with another student and they were both grinning. I thought they were grinning about my t-shirt. I said 'Yes, it says what you think it says. "got hips?" Ohh!!" *yanked in the other direction and then we stop."

"I was just telling her about how much I love watching you dance. You always look like you are having so much fun. It's a joy to watch," David said. The student with him nodded and agreed.

*cue PK turning bright red and hiding behind her hands*

That compliment doesn't come from just anybody. David is a three-time US national champion and a world level competitor (now retired). He has been dancing for over 25 years. I saw David and his former partner, Olga Forapanova, in an exhibition dance earlier this year. I cried (much like I do whenever I watch Ben and Shalene Ermis perform to O Mio Bambino Caro). Poetry in motion. Art.

And he said he likes to watch me dance. Wow. I must be doing something right.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Blast from the Past

In the last 3 weeks, I have bumped into or been contacted by 3 people I knew from high school and one from college.

Do you ever have periods of time where people from your past seem to come out of no where... and then expect you to remember them?

Real Conversation - at Wal Mart:

[PK is minding her own business trying to find little felt thingies so she can protect her hardwood floors. Catches woman with children out of the corner of her eye but pays no attention]

Woman: Don't I know you?
PK: [stunned into near speechlessness] Uh..... I....
Woman: You are PK, aren't you?
PK: [still stunned and even more confused] Yes......
Woman: Wow! It is great to see you! How are you?
PK: I'm sorry.. but... who are you?
[an eon passes, synapeses firing at top speed.. desperately trying to get the facial recognition software part of the brain to work... wait for it.. flickers of recognition.. wait.. there!]
PK: You are So-n-So!
[commence with normal conversation]

Another conversation:
Woman at title company: PK, hold just a moment, someone else wants to talk to you.
PK: Alright.
Other voice: PK! It's JenJen!
PK: Who? I know know lots of JenJens.
Other voice: JenJen BlankityBlank.
[pause]
PK: OH!! Wow! Hey there! How are you?
[commence with normal conversation]

Perhaps the years of hair coloring have had an adverse affect on parts of my brain.

Revenge of the Caption Contest

It's been a long time since I held one (and y'all probably won't enter anymore because I lost the official but unofficially licensed Burger King crown to place on the winner's head), but I just couldn't resist.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

*fanfare*

HEY! This is my first post with my brand new DSL connection. Whoo-hoo! I am so happy right now.

Horse's Blankity Blank they did it.

Nashville may want to fan Olympic flame - Nashville, Tennessee - Wednesday, 07/19/06 - Tennessean.com

Building an 80,000-seat arena for the opening and closing ceremonies, soccer and track and field events would be major hurdles. A swim complex, building of Olympic villages and improving the road systems would be other problems.

"But Atlanta did it. There are creative ways to address those things, like improving campus facilities," Spyridon said. "The question is where do you want it to take you when it's done.


Bull----. I went to Atlanta for the Olympic games. It was impossible to get around. The Atlanta Olympic Committee bus driver got lost and dropped us off at the wrong location. That meant we missed the connection to the swimming venue - and the entire event. I found out later that the US won a gold medal. How many times in one's life will you have to be at an event where your country wins the gold medal - and on home soil? Likely never. We could have been there but NO!

We spent 2 hours wandering around near one of the stadiums (host to the gymnastics event) trying to find someone who could point us in the right direction. And we never found the rhythmic gymnastics venue after an hour of driving somewhere toward Athens.

It was last year before I went back to Atlanta. I hate Atlanta. They should have left it flat to the ground after Sherman burned it. If I had my druthers, I would still drive around the place if at all possible. To compare Nashville with Atlanta must be some form of heresy.

Moving the Bubbies

That's what I call them. Smith and Wesson. They are my bubbies.

"Hello, Bubbies!!!!" I say as they come running to the door when I get home.

We moved them to the new place last night. They were NOT happy. Smith eventually took off for the downstairs, and then Wesson tried to go out of the dance room but refused to leave for about 10 minutes. They both slept in my bed, curled up next to me. That is... when they were sleeping.

They spent a lot of the evening and the night crying and mewing. Elena said she thought they were trying to find each other. The condo is about the same size as the house but a whole different lay out so that it seems bigger. She took some pictures of the boys and me hanging out in the kitchen - Smith hiding under my legs and the cabinet; Wesson sitting on top of the upper cabinets, the highest point he could get to. It was pathetic. They didn't eat any dinner.

Smith wanted to play for a few minutes this morning, so I'm guessing he was feeling a little better. Here's hoping they find the litter box. I will be very upset if there is some "present" on my Oriental rug when I get home.

And last night was the first night I slept in my new place. I tell ya... once I got to sleep, I slept like a rock. It took one of the kitten's walking on me to get me awake. Right as I was walking out the door, the construction crews were pulling up. I hope they aren't too upset that we threw all those moving boxes into their dumpster. My deck looks a lot better now. It just needs some stuff on it, like patio furniture.

I should also tell you: my neighbors are great. On Sunday, one of them helped me get all of my clothes in. K came over and drilled wider holes into the bedframe so that it would fit the Pier 1 headboard. Take THAT, Pier 1! You will not force me to use your technology! K also helped move the mattress and box springs from the old house to the new place. In exchange, my "moving army" and I took all his boxes up to the dumpster. I did the same for C, who lives next door. Just because.

I was telling K about my bubbies' names, and he said, "Oh - you need to tell the guy in ---. He's a gun nut. He'll love it." And my "Come Back with a Warrant" doormat is a hit with everyone who has seen it.

Talk about being blessed...this is a total God thing. For the most part, my move has been pretty smooth. Just a couple of very minor hitches (including an incident which will be described in a future story about why I won't shop at Sears anymore).

My neighbors are fantastic. Good mix of political views (that seems to be a popular question---what's your political persuasion?. There are some W stickers. I won't hold it against them, since I was dumb enough to vote for him twice. I should stick my "Big Brother Is Watching You" poster on my front door - that should answer all the questions about what I think). Once I get unpacked and relatively settled, I'm going to invite them all over for dinner one night.

Now, if I can get my DSL to work, it will all be good. DSL doesn't like my Mac. I pulled out the help disc, and it says on it, "THIS DISC IS NOT COMPATIBLE WITH A MACINTOSH OS. DO NOT USE IN AN 'APPLE' or 'MAC' COMPUTER." Stupid stupid stupid.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Beginnings of..

a virtual tour. At Elena's pestering, I took pictures of stuff as I unpacked and am getting settled. Here ya go!

The Downside of Hardwood Floors

When you are standing on them for 8 or 10 hours at a stretch, your feet, ankles, calves, and knees are VERY sore at the end of the day.

Ow....

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Worst.Song.Ever.

Elena and I were having a discussion about something last night. And then she said something about how awful the "It's a Small World" song is. This lead to Pink Kitty's worst.songs.ever. list.

By "worst song ever," I mean the few, the not-so-proud, the ugly, the awful songs that wriggle into your ear and stay there until you beat yourself unconcious to get them to stop. Yes. Since I came up with this list, they have been trapped there. Since misery loves company, I'm sharing them with you. Audio not included.

1) It's a Small World.

I know Blender/VH1 picked "We built this city" as the most awesomely bad song ever, but that stupid Disney song is leaps and bounds past that. I'm sure the employees at Disney are given some sort of medication to keep them from going insane or they rotate every 15 minutes to other parts of the park where they don't have to hear that blasted cheery "music." And the freakish puppets!

Elena commented that the song from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory is just as bad. I say no. It's not good but it isn't as bad as "It's a Small World" for the simple reason Danny Elfman didn't want to write it but Tim Burton was more than insistent. And the puppets catch fire at the end. That doesn't happen on the ride at Disney. If it did, I might knock this down a peg or two.

2) The Song that never ends.

Does this really need an explanation? No. Didn't think so. Sock puppets are evil.

3) The Barney song.

When Barney was it, you couldn't escape this song. It was EVERYWHERE. I could go on into some rant about the indoctrination of children with hippy propaganda but really - it's just a bad and very annoying song.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

The Next Church Movement

The contemporary American church is all about trends. That all modern America is about, so it isn't any surprise that the Church mimics or reflects the society that it inhabits. For years, the trend has been toward seeker-sensitive churches. Bigger. Better. Lavish production numbers. Professional musicians. There is one church that has a Starbucks and a rock climbing wall in its sanctuary.

They attempt to re-create the outside world in their little bubble of a church, creating yet another Christian ghetto. This is definitely true with large mega churches that have the space and resources to offer everything from schools to vacations to shopping on site or in affiliated spaces. Don't think this problem is limited to only the super mega churches. The neighborhood church in Podunk is just as susceptible to the Christian ghetto. You know - the only people you hang out with are people from your church.

I'm sure contemporary churches started with new churches with young pastors trying to reach out to the more media savvy suburbanites they were surrounded by. Probably burnt out on the hymns they sang growing up, they designed the musical portions of their services to be more like concerts, singing pop songs (that sometimes are about as deep as a Petri dish). Sermons fell more into the self-help category rather than meaty spiritual topics for one to chew on all week through prayer and study. Is it really necessary to have all the message points begin with a "P" or wrap everything up into kicky little catch phrases? They made Christianity easy and accessible to the masses.

They reduced church to a formula that lasted no more than 60 minutes so you can get in, get out and get on with your day. Church shouldn't be a chore. It shouldn't be something on your to-do list, either... checking it off in the same way you check off cutting the lawn or ironing clothes.

I am not saying that the contemporary church or those that are seeker-oriented are bad. They have a purpose. All hellfire and brimstone doesn't do much to reach out to the person that was burned by a so-called Christian as a teenager. I know - I was one. In 1993 after I returned from Russia, I was pretty distant from God. The day I got back, my mom gave me a letter she received while I was gone telling me about a mission trip at the church for next year. I was so excited and thought "YAY! That is such a God thing! I just got back.. I love Russia. Perfect!" I show up at the meeting and some old coot at the door told me I couldn't come in because I was too young. I walked out of that church and can count on one hand the number of times I went back. I became incredibly hostile to Christians for years. It was 7 years later that I returned to God because I found a church that just gave love to anyone... so unlike anything else I came across previously. It was at one of these seeker-oriented churches that I re-built my relationship with God.

Anyway, Christians should NOT be working to make people feel guilty about what they have done because we have all sinned and fallen short. The emphasis on God's grace and love for us is needed. The problem lies in that the pendulum swung too far the other way, turning God into some sort of divine hippy that is all about peace and love where there is no punishment. And as I mentioned before, many of these churches are Christian ghettos. They do not reach out to the community past their own property line or membership rolls.

(Sidebar: I wish I could remember where I read this but a long time ago, I read a snippet about a man involved with a ministry that had received some criticism about who they were trying to reach. He said that he believed in making a end-run to the gates of hell to get people out. That stuck with me. In all honesty, I certainly don't live that way. While I may be a Christian, I am still trying to figure out how God wants to use me. Sometimes I feel as though I am not being effective at all... that I am being safe. Then I am reminded that I don't have the same calling as others... that what I do is no less important and what they do is no more important when we all have the same common goal.)

In the last couple of years, there has been a small revolt brewing. Again, it starts with younger Christians. They grew up in the contemporary churches of their parents. They probably became frustrated because, thanks to the internet and a massive number of channels on cable, they saw the injustice in the world and wanted to do something about it. They felt their spirituality was only surface deep. This has lead to the New Monasticism and a resurgence of creative ministry and outreach programs like XXXchurch.com.

For those of you not aware, the New Monasticism is a movement where a small community of believers buys a house in a poor urban neighborhood and fixes it up to live there. From that base, they grow their own food and reach out to the community around them in places like Philadelphia. They bought the house across the street from their property. It took some time, but they finally got the OK from the city. When they got in there, they had to go through the roof to start cleaning it out because it was so full of trash and drug paraphernalia. Once it was cleaned out, they turned it into a place where prostitutes could stay. They are connected to a local church, so it isn't a para-church organization. They firmly believe that Christians are to serve together.

This is a reactionary driven movement. They see what is going on in the world around them and seek to do something about it.

Again, there is a possibility that this will swing to its opposite extreme where the organization is so focused on being hip and cool that any opportunity to minister and reach out to someone will be lost. Where is the line of where you look so much like the world that non-believers don't see a distinction between how they live their lives and how a Christian lives theirs? There are times when I can honestly say that I don't see a difference - even in my own life.

Stop it with the Emo haircuts and hip, cool, smart-person looking glasses, OK? You are not a hipster. Suit coats paired with hoodies was never a good fashion statement. I don't know why someone thought it was cool, but it's just stupid. Don't pretend to be one.

While I am at it, stop trying to make me feel guilty about what I am or am not doing for the
Kingdom of God. Guilt and shame are not of God. They should not be tools in the Christian's arsenal. I don't have your calling. God gave me different talents and abilities. He put me in a different place. We all can't be toes. There have to be fingers, hip joints, ribs, and spleens. All of these work together for the glory of God as we are the BODY of Christ. Just because socks work on the feet doesn't mean they will work on elbows. God put me in a place where I work with the young people who will be the movers and shakers. Who are you to say that my kindness and love to/for them is any less effective for the Kingdom than serving with Meals on Wheels?

So, some of the criticism is warranted. I would definitely agree that there is an element to the American church that is fat and lazy, but painting it with such a broad brush is dangerous. I'm sure what they are trying to do is spur people to action - to live out their faith as we are commanded to do - but I think they sound more whiny than inspiring.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Kat!

Just so you know, we set a closing date for Thursday. Are you happy now?

:)

Pink Kitty's Movie Review

So, like everyone else in the US, I went to see Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest this weekend. (I'm not linking it because y'all are smart enough to google it for yourselves if you are really that curious.) Spoil-eriffic review....

It was good. I liked it. More Captain Jack Sparrow - what's not to love. More cheesy goodness in the action sequences and references to the first film ("Hide the Rum." and "Why is the rum always gone" being 2 of the references). Totally unbelievable fighting ability from Elizabeth Swann (do I really think that a young lady brought up in the aristocracy of 17th Century England would be able to handle 2 swords at the same time and fend off mystical sea creatures that used to be sailors? No. I don't but it was fun to watch anyway.)

Here's my problem with it: talk about your political propaganda... the EVIL in the "Mum! Don't touch it! It's EVIL!" category person in this whole movie is the representative from the East India Trading Company. I left with a sour taste in my mouth at the implied notion that the EIC is the root of all evil over the seas; that they are worse than an immortal Davy Jones who has the Kracken eat ships because his heart was broken. Why are they worse? Because they want the heart of Davy Jones so they will control Davy Jones and therefore the Kracken. I mean... Davy Jones is evil but at least it's because he has a broken heart... not that he's a greedy capitalist.

Be sure to stay for the end of the credits. Bonus goodness!

Favorite moment of the screening: When the trailer for The Transformers movie comes up and Michael Bay's name appears and the entire audience groans. That was funny right there. I don't care who you are. All I can think of whenever I see/hear his name is "Why does Michael Bay get to keep making movies.... Pearl Harbor sucked and I miss you." From Team America.

The Inexplicable Attractiveness of Captain Jack Sparrow

Notice, I didn't say Johnny Depp. Johnny Depp is a good actor. His politics run off the deep end (I think living in France does that... they some how think they are more civilized and advanced. We won't get too deep into that discussion for this article.. not really important) but I like a fair number of his movies.

I *really* liked him in Pirates of the Caribbean. The second Captain Jack Sparrow pops onto the screen, there is this collective “ohhh…” from women around the country. Much like when Viggo as Aragorn does that look in The Fellowship before he goes to kick some orc butt. I remember the gasps throughout the audience. Come to think of it, Viggo’s politics are also left leaning. Eh. Whatever. He looks really good in leather.

So, back to Captain Jack Sparrow. Every woman I’ve talked to who saw the movie pretty much thinks Jack rocked and Will is a wuss. It could be that Orlando Bloom comes across as *way* too pretty. And that is just genetic. God made him a pretty boy.

Yet, none of us were able to quite put our finger on it. It isn’t just that it’s the bad boy persona. We see that everywhere. Is it that we see he is a bady boy but just *know* that he has a heart of gold? The accent? Possibly. Is it the statement "but why is the rum gone?" We finally settled on one thing: eyeliner.

Don’t know why… but Captain Jack Sparrow without the kohl around the eyes would be less than Captain Jack Sparrow.

Would this look work for every man? Eh. Probably not.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

More reasons I am a libertarian

I swear... if I wasn't one already, the home buying experience would make me one. I'm almost to the point of going all Waco-like and turning my new condo into a compound. I even bought this doormat. I think it is very me, but it was requested by those who want to visit me that I put it at the back door since they think it would be too much at the front door.

You know - that makes sense actually. The ATF wouldn't use the front door. They would use the back door. So, thanks y'all. You know who you are. Good idea!

Anyway, so, we were supposed to close tomorrow. We aren't closing tomorrow. Why? Because the city hasn't issued the certificate of occupancy. My understanding is that the city has done its inspection but hasn't returned the paperwork yet so we can go to closing. They did their inspection some time ago. Now, if they had some things that they told the builder to fix (like the grading problem in the back. That inspector was back out there yesterday... good day for that when we have buckets of rain) and they need to re-inspect, fine. Just tell somebody that, ok? So they can tell me.

That would be REALLY helpful, ya know?

My broker was really cool about it. He said "Don't stress. You have your owner's walk tomorrow. (That would be today) Since it is going to be early next week before you can close, go through and be very nit picky. Find every little flaw. Anything you want changed, get them to change it. They have the time to do so. Make sure that it is perfect."

I guess I'm just ready for this to be done so I can move in. I have enough stress in my life and the move isn't exactly helping. The training for the upcoming competition and dealing with the dress designer (who isn't shipping the dresses for the first fitting until the 11th - ack! If they don't fit or look good... then what?! This particular designer has officially ruffled alot of feathers at the studio because he over-committed. All I can say - these dresses better look amazing.)

Work.... "let's create a new database and you have 3 weeks to encode all the information in the system for printing in August." What? OK.. training?
Eh.. training... this isn't user friendly. I don't care that I can look at in XML. I know you are a programming geek kind of guy but XML isn't easy to read. Where's the pretty page? OK now how do I put these bins in to a plan? Where do I set the rules? Why couldn't we have used one of our programs as a sample and not the Spanish minor? It would have made a lot more sense. It makes my head hurt. And it makes my boss stressed out, which makes me stressed out.

I need a drink.