Tuesday, July 20, 2004

On a theme

Selfishness.... not mine. Someone else.

For the record: this is the second attempt to write this post. The first ended with me getting ready to press the "publish" button and Netscape crashing. I hate computers.

Anyway, Bravo has a new show "Things I hate about you." The premise is couples make their case for who is more annoying. Through videotape, we see all sorts of bad and annoying behavior - farting/belching, soliciting backrubs from everyone, constant announcements of lists, and possibly purposeful forgetfulness.

It was the very first episode and I think I've seen the best moment of the show. Patrick's gripe is that Renee loves her dog more than him. She sings to him, takes for ever to say goodbye, sings songs about him and on and on. Conversation in point:

Patrick loves Renee so much that he takes allergy medication to be with her. He's highly allergic to Samson (the dog). One day, he's run out of medication and talks about how much he's been sneezing and itching.

Renee: Do you want to sleep on the couch tonight? Because of your allergies, you know....
(PK's response - jaw drops in floor, yells at tv "WHAT?!, real Empress Kitty wakes up and looks annoyed, goes back to sleep)
Patrick: How about Samson sleep on the couch?
Renee: Samson needs to sleep. He can't sleep on the couch.
Patrick: I need to sleep. I have to work tomorrow.
Renee: He's not allergic. I'm not allergic.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, you read that right. She actually suggested that her boyfriend sleep on the couch instead of the dog. Elena knows I love my cat. But, we do have well defined pet/human relations. At a certain point, I exercise my God-given right at the top of the food chain and remind her that I am, in fact, the human. Without me, the cat food would not be replenished, the string not tossed, and the litter not cleaned.

And, I would have no problem letting Her Royal Highness sleep elsewhere if there was a significant other in my bed. I thought I was selfish.. maybe I'm not so bad after seeing this.

Renee saw no problem at all.. AT ALL.. with placing her dog above her boyfriend. "Is it wrong to love your dog?" She was actually offended that Patrick would have a problem with Samson. She said he was jealous.

Patrick won the overall scoring and his prize was a new Gibson guitar and for Samson to sleep in the couch for a week. Renee made a big ol' fuss and eventually slept on the couch with the dog so the dog didn't get lonely.