Hollywood has an idea!

Hollywood Rediscovers Grown-Ups

Some executive just woke up one day and realized that... SHOCK!... there are people in the United States that are not 12 year old boys. And these people have money...

And these people are not going to movies because 98% of the movies out there are stup.. er.. geared to tweens and teens.

Here's the meeting transcript.

Head Honcho: OK, boys, we are losing money. What do we do?
Lackey #1: We could release another movie with Adam Sandler...
Lackey #2: Or American Pie: the Baby Carriage...
Lackey #3: What about... um... I got nuthin'
HH: No no no. Think original.. think outside of the box. Reconceptualize your framework... [other office nonsense dialogue]

[long... long.... lonnnnngg pause]

L3: Well.. we could try to hit another market.
L1: Yeah! All those Christians will go to movies if Jesus is in it. So, let's put Jesus at a summer beach house with a bunch of hot girls...
L2: No! The beach thing has been done to death.. you just want to sell the movie with boobs barely covered by bikinis. Jesus should be the next Van Helsing character... fighting Satan with big guns and a sexy chick in heels and a corset. And make sure Jesus looks like Hugh Jackman to get the women to come see the movie. Women love Hugh Jackman.
HH: [nods thoughtfully]
L1: Or... um... maybe we ought to try making movies for the tweens parents?
HH: SACRILIGE! YOU ARE FIRED!!!! (HH has watched The Apprentice too much)
L2: No, sir. I think it’s a good idea. Where do we think the tweens are getting their money…. they don’t have real jobs. They are getting them from their parents. If we make movies the parents will like, they will spend that money before the kids. We will lose out a little bit on the product tie-ins, but they have more connections.. word of mouth you know, Sir.
HH: OK.. L1, you’re not fired. But make sure that there’s something that looks like a plot in these movies. Go back and find some old movies that did well in the 1950’s and 1960’s. We can re-make them with younger, more attractive actors as well as update the underlying message to reflect that the war in Iraq is wrong. Let’s get to it!