C.S.A - The Review

Now that it isn't playing in Nashville and that I've had the opportunity to really think about the movie, here's what I thought:

As a movie, it was good. As the director said in his talk while in Nashville, it could very easily have gone way overboard on satire and not been effective in challenging people to consider the continuing issue of race in America.

My questions for Kevin didn't really gel in my mind until the very end (when the Q&A portion was over, of course)—Wasn't all of this the fault of government intrusion into the personal lives of individuals? When does it become the responsibility of the state to make moral decisions? Should they be making moral decisions? Can a state even make moral decisions?

You say that we shouldn't be trying to impose our culture on other countries [this came out in a question about what was going on with American policy in the Middle East and how that paralleled with the film and its 'Tropical Empire' plans the Confederacy had] but as Vox Day pointed out over a week ago, where are those complaining that the British were wrong in ending the practice of widow burning in India?

You say the end of slavery was good but in the same breath say that we shouldn't 'export democracy' or our way of thinking/life to other countries and cultures. Should we not export the Western value that ALL types of slavery is bad? There seems to be a serious problem with sexual slavery across the globe. People might say that is a human value but you can't say since not all humans have the same values. Ted Bundy didn't value the lives of young women the same way, oh.. Mother Teresa did.

You are right in saying that when a prime field hand was worth the equivalent of a luxury car. When the government attempted to take individuals luxury cars, there was going to be a fight. Unfortunately, that is not the case anymore. There is no fight. By sucking the taxes out before we get our pay checks, people don't think about it. That money was never theres. Yes it was. You earned it. It should be yours.

(Side rant: I love DC's comment that the IRS is like the mafia.. except that the mafia tells you how much you owe them up front. The IRS gives you forms, makes you fill it out and if you do it wrong, they will beat you up. People who think that they still own their property ought to not pay their property tax... see how long they own their property then.)

Other things that I took away from the screening: a room full of white guilt mixed with the anger of black people. One woman admitted that after seeing the movie that for the first time she wanted to beat up some white folk. Several white folks got up and stated that they felt guilty for what happened. I was probably one of the few people in the room completely indifferent to the whole white guilt tidal wave.

I didn't do anything to cause slavery, Jim Crow laws, or the like. Therefore, I have no reason to be or feel guilty over something that happened in the past. The only thing I can control is my attitude and response - now.

Also, as a Christian, guilt and shame can become tools of the enemy to trap us and hold us down. How many people do you know that are held hostage by guilt over something?

Don't mistake this for being cavalier about it. I'm not. Yes, there are racial issues that need to be addressed.

I applaud the director for also saying that liberals are just as much at fault for covering everything up with politically correct language that the lingering hurts, pain, continuing discrimination cannot be openly and honestly dealt with.

You know...

I was going to say something, but I forgot what it was.

PK's Rules of Sidewalk Etiquette

When you and your party are walking in a horizontal line, thereby using the entire sidewalk, the person(s) walking into oncoming traffic should move to either the front or back of your little group before I knock their butt down because you are in my way.

I do not have to move off the sidewalk to accomodate your conversation about... whatever it was you were talking about.

Hope your shoulder is OK. Mine is still a little sore. But... you should have moved.

Question for my fellow libertarians

Why is it that in debates about social policy, we come off sounding like callous, un-caring folks that 'don't care about the poor'? Is there a way that we can structure what we say and the message of "the government may be here but it isn't here to help" in speaking of helping the poor and less blessed in society?

Or has American society just gone too far in to the sense of entitlement that the libertarian message of self-reliance (as well as you help your neighbor voluntarily) will forever be lost?

Birthday Wishes

Y'all share the love - it's Miss O'Hara's birthday!

It's all about the expression

Uh... yeah... she makes me want to buy this dress:



It's like a zombie prom night thing.

Going to great lengths....

for a toy. A little boy wriggled into a toy machine because he wanted one. And he wanted it now!

I wonder if that was any easier than those stupid crane things that never work but you keep sticking the dollars in anyway because the pink elephant is just too cute. And if you finally get it, you realize it wasn't worth $20.

Do you think those things are rigged to give you the toy after you spend a certain amount of money? It's like a carnival game with even worse odds.

Anyway, here's the toy machine spelunker's picture:


Next bill before your local legislature: banning of toy vending machines. They are awful and represent a real danger to children everywhere. Because government has fixed everything else. A bill on that would rank right up there next to the road kill bill in my opinion.

A purr to Elena for emailing the article.. and for explaining the picture to me because I didn't read the email and only looked at the picture. Duh.

How not to handle a lady on the dance floor

Sundays at the studio are geared more toward newer dancers. I'm OK with that. There is a core group of people who I hang out with, and everybody dances with everyone else. Skill level isn't really that important.

We were all beginners at one point.

However...

Just because you are a beginner, Mr. "I'm New to Dance," doesn't mean that you can ignore proper dance frame.

Rule 1: Do NOT grab anywhere near my breasts or the sides of my breasts. Your hand goes on my back—at the shoulder blade. You are not my husband or my doctor—you do not have permission to touch me there.

Rule 2: Leading a lady down the line of the dance doesn't mean acting like a bulldozer and shoving her across the floor. Social dance isn't the Indy 500!

I actually stopped one guy (who was attempting to count the beat and was totally missing) and said, "No! Stop. Listen to the beat. You are counting too fast. It's a waltz. Listen for the strong downbeat. That's 1. 1, 2, 3. 1, 2, 3." He nearly knocked me over because he was almost literally running down the dance floor. I'm not sure what his hurry was.

Then Mr. Cha-Cha guy... A cross-body lead does not entail whipping me across the room and dislocating my shoulder, sir. I've seen you there at the studio before. You know better than that.

A Quote for the Professor...

"I agonized over whether or not to take Morocco's workshops, and in the end I decided not to. Well, it wasn't exactly a decision per se. In a word, I chickened out. Morocco is the grand dame of American belly dancing, the final authority on all things undulating, and the Commander-in-Chief of the Ethnic Police. As Aunt Rocky, she rules the belly dance listserv with an iron mouse. I have seen list members shredded—shredded, I tell you—by Aunty Rocky's rapier tongue and inexhaustible knowledge of Oriental dance (she detests the B-word) ... Morocco makes my blood run cold with terror. I can't imagine subjecting my stupid hands and sloppy hips to her critique. ... as I only know her as this mythic figure, Aunt Rocky, dancing since the Mesozoic era, keeper of all records danse orientale."
—Anne Thomas Soffee, Snake Hips: Belly Dancing and How I Found True Love. Pp.170, 175.

By the way, Morocco now has a blog. Her one post of length (it is new) is about how militant Islam threatens music and dance in the Middle East. It is actually a pretty good article and commentary.

I Wish I Were in Dixie

Hoorah! Hoorah! Maybe.. not really. I dunno.

I went to the Belcourt last night for the special presentation of C.S.A. Kevin Wilmott, the director of the film was there.

I was going to tell you what I thought about it but the Belcourt has it in a extended engagement through Sunday (it was supposed to leave yestersday). Next Monday, I will post my thoughts about it and we can go from there.

I don't want to completely spoil it until you have the chance to see it.

The Power of Positive Thinking

On my way to lunch yesterday, I was pondering the new choreography from my belly dance lesson. It was the material from the Bozenka workshop I sat in on. I made it through the warm-up and then my body said "No - go sit. We are finished."

So, Linda and I were working on the choreography. I think I need to start giving myself more credit as a dancer. I told her I wanted to try the watered-down version first. 10 minutes in she said "We aren't watering this down very much. Forget it. You are doing the real thing." Layering and all. It isn't particularly difficult - but making it look really good will take time and practice. It will happen. I am looking forward to adapting it to other pieces of music (and showing my ballroom instructor, who I still think doesn't really have a clue as to my belly dancing abilty. Yes, he knows but... ah well. Maybe it is just a nagging something-or-other.)

Back to the story. I was going over the choreography in my mind. "Left-shimmy. Right-shimmy. Left-shimmy. Turn... Three-step-turn quick quick... you thought I was going to do that hip swivle fast but no!" Well, you get the idea. I don't know if thinking about this made me walk differently or carry myself differently. I moved over to the far right of the sidewalk because there was someone walking much faster than me coming up from behind. I don't walk very fast. I have short legs and.. well.. why hurry? The destination will still be there when I eventually get there.

As the person moved beside me, I saw that it was a tall man. He turned and smiled and said "hello." I smiled and said "hello" and thought "WOW - he's very handsome. Who is he? Must be a professor.. should I know who he is? I wish I knew who he is."

So, this got me to thinking, does what I think about while I am randomly walking around affect my carriage... my aura (for lack of a better word)? If thinking about dance garnered that kind of reaction what if I were thinking other things....

Or it could be he was just being polite.

Maybe there is something to those quizzes

Via Katherine

In a Past Life...

You Were: A Greasy Belly Dancer. Where You Lived: Peru. How You Died: The Plague.

Who Were You In a Past Life?

That one hit just a little too close to home... Heh.

South Park Kills Chef

Proof that the South Park Studios can crank out an episode in less than 2 weeks and have it be very funny, they killed Chef last night. Chef ran off to join the Super Adventure Club and came back brainwashed.

That fruity little club did it. You bastards!

They even parodied themselves and the Scientology episode to do it. Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

The episode will be available for download from iTunes in about a week (according to the South Park Studios website.)

Update: I forgot that they spoof the end of Episode III with Chef Vader rising from the Super Adventure Club lab.

Best.Fug.Ever.

I am a loyal reader of the Go Fug Yourself site. I wish I was as funny as those girls. I mean - they are funny. But when you get pictures like this, the job is made much easier.

If it wouldn't scare students, I think I would make it a permanent homepage or desktop or something.

Caption Contest - Presidential Edition

PKs entry: W imitating his father being imitated by Dana Carvey - "Not gonna do it. Wouldn't be prudent."

And yours?

PK and Elena discuss interior decorating

Partially edited for hilarity

PK: What do you think of this chair? I think it is a good contrast to the couch, which will look something like this one when I've had it re-covered. The curve of the chair will go with the curve of the gossip bench and with the end tables. The couch is a bit on the 1940s side of mod. And the end tables and chair are on the modern-day-inspired-by-mod side... mixed with SHAG artwork and a shag rug... and a blonde wood dresser... it's going to be a funky space. ……….. Or am I trying to talk myself into this?

Elena: It looks like a chocolate cube and Strong Mad mated and had one HUGE baby. It doesn't grab me. But it might be nice to sit in. I could feel like a sweet cherry filling!

PK: Oh that's funny. But at least it isn't a log. Hmm… Well, the chair does come in a couple of other colors. And like the dishes—I didn't like them online but loved them in person—I need to get to a store and sit in it...and then wait for it to go on sale if I like it.

Elena: I dunno. I think the chair would look like it's pissed at the couch and the couch, like it doesn't give a whup. And the gossip bench is all like, "Aren't I cute? OK, everybody, party games!!!" And the shag carpeting, like it's a total gigolo. ;o) ….. I still don't really like the chair. But it's your living room. And I would still enjoy sitting in it, I'm sure. :o) *ting!*

PK: LOL!!!!! OK OK! I'll keep looking for a chair.

Tell Him to Leave It ALONE!

Because George Lucas needs more money...

Star Wars TV series in the works

Ugh. You know... after the release of Episode III, I distinctly remember Lucas saying he was ready to move on to other projects. So, he went back to Indiana Jones. The guy hasn't had an original idea in nearly 30 years.

I hope it is on cable because I won't have it and he won't have the chance to ruin the whole series again for me. The Clone Wars animated series was good—because he was barely involved in it. Much like Empire was the best of the original series because he had less of a role in its production.

F*** the IRS

That's all I have to say about that.

Osmosis

When I was in school, I would fall asleep on my books, usually by accident. However, I never wore them as fashion statements.

Eww.

Hat.. heh tip to Miss O'Hara.

To the guy walking down 4th Ave S yesterday afternoon

A belt would hold up your pants much better than your method. Walking down the street, clutching your manhood through your jeans just isn't very attractive.

Dude. That looked uncomfortable. How long did you walk like that? Are you trying to impress the lady-friend (who was no fashion plate herself) walking with you? Did someone tell you that if you ever took your hand off your member that someone would steal it? If so, you need to get over that.

They Killed Chef!

WorldNetDaily: Isaac Hayes quits 'South Park' after spoof on Scientologists

That was one of the funniest episodes ever. Right after "Die, Hippie, Die."

Stan: "Dad! Tom Cruise won't come out of the closet!"

Stan: And best of all, I wrote that all the Scientologists should no longer have to pay money to belong.
President of Scientology: What?
Stan: I realized that to really be a church, we can’t charge people for help.
President of Scientology: What, are you stupid? Then how do we make money from those people?
Stan: Well, it’s not about the money, but it’s about the message, right?
President of Scientology: Wait a minute, whoa! Whoa! You don’t actually believe this crap! Do you? Dummy! Brain washed alien souls? E-meter and thetan levels? Those people out there buy that crap. But I thought you were smart enough to see what’s really going on!
Stan: But you said that there was...
President of Scientology: What's better telling people a stupid story and having them believe you? Having them pay you for it, stupid!

Tom Cruise: I'll sue you! I'll sue you in England!

I'm with Matt and Trey on this one. Social commentary and satire needs to be on everyone to be truly effective.

With the lovely and talented Miss O'Hara

With the ever-fabulous Pink Kitty!
Originally uploaded by Zach's Dame.

She's faster than me. She has the pics of the wedding shower up on her flickr stream.

I have some that I will eventually get around to uploading. Heh. Enjoy.

By the way, my card garnered the most laughs. It was this little dog wearing one of those little collars they put on them after they get fixed. The inside said "Anyone else feel like a martini?"

Heh. I may be absurd, but you will always get good presents from me.

There are some things I just should stop reading

Now that I'm back at a computer, I've spent a fair amount of time catching up on blogs and tribe.net and the news.

First, news is way overrated. For Lent, I gave up cable TV. Aside from a little bit of the History Channel, Headline News, and one episode of "Law and Order: SVU," I've just not been watching cable. I won't be taking it with me when I move next month, so now is good practice.

My life has continued on as normal without the knowledge that Paris Hilton's 15 minutes of fame are over. Uh... but who would we make fun of? And I'm sure there were some other important news stories that I've missed, but I just can't seem to find a reason to care. Something about a child abuse conviction... and a dead girl in an alley. Meh. I am going back inside my bubble.

Second, there was this discussion at Vox's about nice guys. After I fought the urge to go disinfect myself because I just felt icky... this is the only thing that I found be worthy of sharing:

It is not ok to abuse the weak...

Oh baloney, since when, VQ? It's so much fun, it should be a sport.

All you gay guys who want to call yourselves 'misogynists' just make me sick. Shame on you all.

There is no more perfect creature that walks the earth than woman, and judging them by your own failings just makes you small.

Nurture them. Love them. Take them to your sides as if they were your rib. Don't take any crap. Figure out how to be a man, and be one.

Dammit.

Buncha frakkin whiners...
Bane

There was just so much hatin' going on in that thread. It is almost enough to make a girl like myself swear off men in general and just live with my cats. Do these "misogynists" think about how they sound to the sane single girls out there? I'm sure these particular guys probably don't care. I see the complaints they have about feminists and the ultra-modern woman. And yes, some of them are valid. But when these complainers start painting with large brush strokes that all American women are this way or that way... *sigh* Why should I care?

Unrelated, my ficus bonzai, Spike, had a major growth spurt while I was gone. Geez. I trimmed him 3 weeks ago. I am going to have to give him another haircut.

Things will be even more quiet...

I am leaving town in the morning and won't be back to a computer until Tuesday.

MWWAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Sorry.

I'm going to chill out with lovely and talented Miss O'Hara for the weekend.

What you missed by not coming to the studio on Sunday

My first ever live in front of people belly dance performance.

Totally unplanned. Completely improvised.

And I didn't fall down and apparently it looked relatively good judging by the applause and questions I got afterwards.

They played the English remake of a Turkish pop song (I know both versions really well). Duke Diva said "PK, you gotta dance to that."

"Yes, I do." And I ripped off my ballroom shoes and proceeded to dance over 3 and a half minutes that about halfway through became really surreal. It was very much an out-of-body experience. Duke Diva told me people were staring from all over the ball room.. these teenagers were peeking around the columns to see what I was doing. Hee.

Then I spent the next half hour coughing because I hadn't properly warmed back up to dance a song that fast. Ahh... allergies.

Shimmy Break!!!!!

Everyone run to the nearest bathroom and shimmy!

Or shimmy in your seats. Whatever.

Attacking Flickr

I posted a bunch-o-stuff on flickr today. Here's one of them: with Sharon Kihara at the Belly Dance Superstars show 2 weeks ago. We talked about Nashville and the weight of all the jewelry and stuff tribal dancers wear. She is just a very sweet person. And an amazing amazing dancer to boot.

And another... there are more than just cats and belly dancers. I posted pics from Charleston and Tango Nashville, too:

Is the local media going to mention this?

Libertarian Best-Selling Author, Harry Browne, Dies

He lived in Franklin, you know.

I met him once. He was a very nice man. Extremely well-spoken and slick... like most politicians. But at least he wanted to get rid of intrusive government.

Note: I'm not intending to bash the local folks... but since he did live here, it would be nice if they mentioned him. I could go all conspiracy theory on ya and complain about the fact they ignore libertarians.

Bored at Work

The subject matter [re-districting and stuff] was extremely technical, and near the end of the argument Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg dozed in her chair. Justices David Souter and Samuel Alito, who flank the 72-year-old, looked at her but did not give her a nudge.

I don't fault her. When I worked at the ice rink, I fell asleep at the front desk one morning. It was quiet. There weren't many people there. I just went straight to sleep. Some kid kept whispering "ma'am" to wake me up.

However, me falling asleep at the ice rink doesn't quite have the same professional impact as a Supreme Court Justice nodding off in the middle of arguements.

High Court Tackles Political Boundry Case - Yahoo! News

And they call white people racist...

The Redhead and I were on our way to lunch the other day. We crossed Belcourt on our way to Sam's. When we started across the street, traffic prevented this large white vehicle from turning left. As we got about 3/4 of the way across, said vehicle made a sharp left turn to squeeze between a gap in the traffic flow.

The black woman driving it yelled something. I didn't hear her. The Redhead said "And they call white people racist."

"What did she say?"

"Get your cracker a$$es out the way."

"I can't say ni**er without the fury of the NAACP and other assorted individuals coming down on me? Oh that's fair. You call me a cracker, and I have full rights to use ni**er. It is a good thing I didn't hear her."

The general concensus among my friends is that the woman was very much blessed that I didn't hear her. My brother's reaction was "Yeah... because I'd be bailing your cracker a$$ out of jail right now. Or visiting you in the hospital." Duke Diva said something similar - where she thought I might have called her every name in the book except ni**er.

Rights to use does not mean I would use it. I do believe in a certain level of civility when dealing with other humans, even though I don't particularly care for them. Society has gotten too coarse, disrespectful, and rude. I resent the fact that she would near pick a fight with me and I am not free to use the equivalent word as a response.

I don't want to hear anything about how it's different because she's a minority. It's respect, people. It's obeying the traffic laws. Pedestrians have the right of way. We weren't bothering her... other than apparently our presence on this planet.

Lent

Do you observe the Lenten season?

If so, how? Why?

Or, why not?

Do I or Don't I?

Ask that really cute guy from the dance Saturday night (assuming I see him again) out/for phone number/etc...?

I ask this because I just want to hear the yelling that will ensue from Miss O'Hara. She hasn't vented enough lately.

I'm IT!

Kat (who is one of my favorite people-EVER) tagged me. So I'm IT. Of course I am. I am the fizzle shinizzle banizzle or whatever izzle is going around these days. She thinks I won't do it but... mwwhahahahaha... I am!

What Were You Doing 10 Years Ago?

1996? I was in college. In the student senate, raising all sorts of ruckus when I proposed to veto the SGA budget because the President couldn't get it to us on time and spending the money anyway. The press loved me. I loved them. And the loved me for loving them.... Then I became President of the Senate and a year later was nearly impeached because of a miscommunication about the budget. Guess what.. the President of the Senate couldn't be impeached. Hee. They were stuck with me.

I was also in my favorite class of my college career, Judiciary and the Constitution. Spring Semester 1996 is when I became a classical liberal. A year later, I became a libertarian after working for the TN General Assembly. My paper on the Supreme Court's decisions affecting women in the workforce was published in the student academic journal. Yes, I still had some lingering feminist tendancies but at least I wasn't foaming at the mouth anymore. I did my senior seminar paper that fall on Russian Ethnic conflict.

I spent more time starting at Mr. Anderson's eyelashes than listening to anything he had to say in class. Wow... he had beautiful blue eyes. Too bad he was an atheist.

I was also working at the ice rink (talking back to customers and collecting some of the dumbest things ever said and posting it in the break room. The manager didn't like that.) And I turned 21 that year. I spent way too much time online in roleplaying games.

What Were You Doing 1 Year Ago?

Here it is.

Five Snacks You Enjoy

1) Chocolate covered pretzels
2) Apples
3) Wendy's Frosties and French Fries.. again with the sweet/salty combo
4) Chedder and Sour Cream or Kettle potato chips
5) Fried mozerella cheese sticks (and you thought because I was losing weight that I'd forgotten about those great fattening things. No!)

Five Songs To Which You Know All The Lyrics

1) Salam ya Salama by Alabina - it's in Arabic and Spanish so I can make stuff up and no one will notice, but I actually have learned a good bit of the words to that and Habibi Ya Nour El Ein (My Darling, You are the light of my eyes)
2) Happy Birthday
3) Give It to Me Good by Trixter - This popped up on yahoo launch a few days ago. All of a sudden, I was 16 again. I listened to that CD every morning while I was getting ready for school. I wore it out. Really. I had to buy a second one. I was in love with them and was going to marry the lead singer. When I met them back stage at Starwood that was the highlight of my life in high school. I still know every word to that song... even after almost 15 years. That's sad.
4) Gold Digger by Kanye West. Question: When he finds out after 18 years that the baby wasn't his, can he sue the mother for fraud?
5) Go Daddy-O by Big Bad Voodoo Daddy
(OK - that was cheating....)
6) Come live your life with me by Peter Cincotti

Five Things You Would Do If You Were A Millionaire

1) Start my own dance studio
2) Be sure I am out of debt
3) Save some
4) Travel some
5) Sponsor DC in his first poker tournament (but not one of those $10K deals. I like you but not that much.)

Five Bad Habits

1) Misplacing my check card (AmSouth hates me)
2) Biting my nails
3) Leaving the back door unlocked
4) Blogging at work (eh. I'm honest, at least)
5) Speeding

Five Things You Like Doing

1) Dancing
2) Talking about dance
3) Spotting notorious fashion violations
4) Blogging about notorious fashion violations
5) Hanging with my peeps

Five Things You Would Never Wear Again

1) Frosted anything
2) Snarky buttons (I had a jean jacket in middle school that I covered in buttons. I was often late to class because I got stopped in the hall way when people wanted to read them.)
3) Chunky rubber sole/heeled shoes. They make my feet look 2x's bigger than they are. I can't believe I ever thought they looked good.
4) Tapered leg pants. How to make your butt look bigger than it really is? Wear tapered leg pants. NEVER wear tapered pants. Straight or boot cut. Wide leg is on its way out and if it isn't done right, you look like a freak.
5) My favorite khaki pants. They are now 2 sizes too big. Hee!

Five Favorite Toys

1) My mp3 player (Sansa)
2) My Sig (but I don't treat it like a toy.)
3) My Smith and Wesson (the cats) and any of their feathers on sticks
4) My massive collection of hip scarves (the sequined ones are my current favorite. Some of the coin scarves are so heavy they fall right off. I need to velcro them to my hips.)
5) My still in the box Darth Vader

Five people who will not likely do this but you are tagging them anyway

Elena, Miss O'Hara, Digital Cowboy, Res Ispa (now that you are blogging, you are going to do all those stupid quizzes and stuff.. heh), and Erik. I would tag Ashley the Blue Raider but none of us knows where her blog is... or if she has one.

Junk Mail

I got a packet yesterday from the "Citizens United for the Bush Agenda" organization.

The letter said "Dear Friend of President Bush."

I threw it out after I stopped laughing. It took about 5 minutes. Whew. He's never been my friend. I voted for him because, at the time, I found him less detestable than John Kerry.

I won't make that mistake again.

Overheard on Campus

Sometimes, even I don't know what to say about the stuff I hear.

Location: Near dorm parking lot

Guy 1: So how did it go?
Guy 2: Awesome. We f*ed for a solid hour. My sheets are a mess. I am making her wash them tonight.

At the Ryman

This past Sunday was my second trip to the Ryman. I'm ashamed to say that I've lived in Nashville for 30 years and only went to the Ryman for a concert for the first time last December.

I repent! I shall go to the Church of Country Music more often! But they do play more than country there (and we are all glad for that).

But I was there for the country music - the MuzikMafia show to benefit the Country Music Hall of Fame with Gretchen Wilson and Big and Rich.

Show Review:

Gretchen is very confident in her ability to sing because she came out and sang the first song acapella... and without a mic. That also speaks to the acoustics of the building because once everyone shut up, you could hear her clear as bell. That rocked.

Big and Rich's show was a circus... but what else would you expect? I loved it. And the little girl down front who got John Rich's guitar became the envy of everyone the building. I saw her during intermission and she wouldn't it let go. Can't say that I blame her.

Special guest artists: Tom T. Hall and Randy Owen (of Alabama). Randy and Gretchen did a duet that was beautiful. I could listen to him sing all day long.

Fashion Review:

For crying out loud... must I be subjected to horrific fashion everywhere? I guess so. That night was particularly bad. I saw a real mullet. I mean the "business in the front/party in the back" mullet. Talking about a Billy Ray Cyrus circa 1990 mullet. On a girl.

Lesbian biker chic. Eww. She was also wearing a t-shirt where the sleeves had been ripped off so it was like a muscle tee. Double Eww.

A blue jean shirt with lace on the shoulders. That is so very 1980's Reba.

Three words: frosted Mom jeans

Two more words: frosted hair. Did I just land in a time warp that sent me back to 1987?

Those that were trying to look hip and chic were trying way too hard. One lady tried to look like Anna Wintour, Editor in Chief of Vogue magazine.

The worst one the night (as if the mullet wasn't bad enough) was this girl wearing a denim mini skirt (with lace on the hem) and halter top... in 15 degree weather. Oh! It gets better! She was wearing sparkly flip flops! Chick! It's 15 f-ing degrees outside! Put some clothes on!

Hello. My name is Pink Kitty...

And I have a disease. It's called perfectionism.

I achieve something and it is never good enough. I cannot rest. I receive a compliment and then feel obligated to push one or two notches higher so that I will continue to receive compliments. It isn't that I doubt the sincerity of the compliment giver... I just want more. I want to be sure that they continue to give me compliments.

I would never hold anyone else to my standard because there is no way they could meet it. In fact, I can't meet my standard because it is ever-changing. Always pushing higher.

I find a new activity and throw myself in head first.. wanting to know everything about it NOW. This causes me to burn out on activities I really enjoy because I've tried to master it too quickly. Too much information far too soon. I don't allow time for the information to sink into my brain.

I get frustrated when I don't get something right the first time. I think too much and mess myself up. (I said this in my dance lesson the other night. My instructor said "You're right. Let's take it really slowly. Stop thinking about it. Just do the steps.)

I'm overly competitive. As Elena said to me "there is no such thing as a friendly game with you" because even if I throw the score card out, I will still keep track of the score in my head. My dance instructor and I were talking about the possibility of my entering some dance competitions later in the year. I looked at him and said "I will win. I won't settle for anything less." I think it un-nerved him to see that part of me come out because for the most part I've been pretty laid back about learning and being there to have a good time.

I am alot better than I used to be. When I was in college, I couldn't let anything go. EVERYTHING was a competition. I had to be perfect at everything I did.

I achieve a goal and look back and think "I could have done this and this and this better." I am never satisified, never good enough. The amount of pressure I apply to myself is insane. My nutritionist has been particularly vocal on this point. "PK, you met the calorie goal. So what if you were over these couple of days. You are still doing great! Don't be so hard on yourself." Even on the weeks where it is perfect, I look over the journals and go "I shouldn't have eaten that.." or "I could have walked a little further that day."

There are those who would find my drive for perfection good.. that it is a part of the American way of operating. Always pushing for the next big thing. In some circles, it would probably be admired.

It is a sickness. It is unhealthy. I don't know how to rest. I don't know how to stop.

Workshop Report

When one spends, uh... 6 hours over the course of weekend in a bellydance workshop...

the glutes REALLY start to hurt.

And we won't even talk about my shoulders.

My knee didn't start hurting until Sunday night when I smacked it on the pew at the Ryman because Mr. 6' tall wouldn't move so I could get back to my seat after I went to the bathroom. OK, I know the space between rows is very narrow but would have killed you to swing your legs out of the way so I don't have to step over and straddle your lap? Is this something your significant other, who is sitting right there!, approves of? Thank goodness I wasn't wearing a skirt.

Reasons to Love Homestar Runner

Reason #1: It's funny.
Reason #2: Strong Bad has an outrageous accent
Reason #3: It isn't every day you get to see gummy bears in milk.
Reason #4: Lady-ing
Reason #5: Trogdor! Trogdor!!
Reason #6: Cheerleader, So and So, What's her face... The Ugly One! Soooooooo goooooooooood...!!
Reason #7: "Virus = Very Yes"
Reason #8: "On a scale from 1 to Awesome, I am Super Great!"
Reason #9: "The critics agree! "A triumph!" "A cinematic breakfast snack of some kind!" "It {very slight pause} sure was a movie!" {quickly} Now playing in select cities. {rapidly, in the manner of a disclaimer} This Strong Bad Email has been rated P for The Poopsmith and a graphic scene of The Paper."
Reason #10: The Bellydance Superstars love the Web site!

List largely courtesy of Elena. Links added by me. For all things Homestar, visit the wiki. That's wiki, not wookie.

To Digital Cowboy:

Do you still love me, fat bird toy?

Assessing Ashcroft

As I previously stated, former Attorney General John Ashcroft was on campus last night. Newton, I apologize for not getting back to you regarding the ticket. Ashley the Blue Raider went with me.

She wanted to take a picture of the one protester outside Ingram Hall. No one could read her sign because it was dark and written with a sharpie marker. Kudos to her for standing up for her beliefs.

Ashley took notes. Maybe she will post them on her myspace blog. If you do - link it here, Ashes. I should have live-blogged it but my lap top is not working. So on to the lecture...

1) John Ashcroft is a funny man. I mean it. He has a very personable, likeable style and presentation that made it enjoyable to listen to.. even if you don't really like him.

2) No hecklers veto - bonus!

3) The hippies in front of me kept saying "he's not answering the question." Well, just because he's not answering it the way you want him to doesn't mean he isn't answering the question.

4) Best moment of the night - Ashcroft delivers the smack down on a smug student who thought she was morally superior when she asked her question about what he thought of other countries using the death penalty such as China, North Korea, Iran, Iraq, Yemen.... [applause from the anti-death penalty crowd.]

Ashcroft (rough paraphrase): Well at least they got something right. Just because they also have the death penalty doesn't mean we apply it the same way they do. We take great care in the applying the death penalty. The standard for seeking it is very high, very stringent. It isn't applied to everything. We don't make a spectacle out of the executions or put them in the public square as some of the countries you listed do. It isn't morally equivalent because of the different standards set up by each country. China also has running water. Should we get rid of that, too?

I saw a video from Afghanistan while still under Taliban rule. During a soccer match, the moral police rolled in and stopped the game to conduct a series of executions. One woman had been accused of adultery. Her husband and his family forgave her, hoping to spare her life (in accordance with Islamic law). She was still shot in the head. That is the equivalent to the state putting Tim McVeigh to death? Not quite. Now, should the US have the death penalty in general is a better question and one that should be considered carefully.

5) Religion Professor asking about Ashcroft's justification of the death penalty in light of Jesus letting the adulteress go "Let he who is without sin, cast the first stone." First, the professor kept paraphrasing Scripture 'in the spirit of' or some such statement. Ashcroft kept telling him to quote it exactly. He finally did. Ashcroft ultimate responded with a passage from Romans about the Sword of God. The professor said "The Romans didn't execute with the sword. They used the stone and the cross" and sat down to applause from the anti-death penalty crowd.

My problem with the whole exchange was that the Professor didn't acknowledge that the woman brought before Jesus was a part of a trap. If Jesus had pronounced a sentence, they would have gone to the Roman authorities since it was Rome who made the life/death decisions. That is why the Pharisees couldn't execute Jesus - they had to take him to Pilate for the actual act.

In all likelihood, this woman was pulled from her bed - not actually caught in the act of adultery as they said she was and prescribed by law. But the community knew about it and ignored it till this point. If it was in the actual act, where was the man? They are both to be punished (in this case stoned) according to Jewish law.

Jesus was pointing out the lie in their own story.. in addition to telling all of us to act with mercy and compassion. Jesus acknowledged the woman's sins and forgave them. I don't believe that Jesus was advocating a position that we just forget/forgive/let pass criminal activity.

The follow-up comment by an audience member to this discussion was that we were showing so much compassion for the guilty but where was the compassion for the victim and their family? They would never see their loved one again. Where is the justice for them? This doesn't mean that all victim's relatives are blood thirsty but if you just let the guy go, where is the justice?

6) Ashcroft asked the question: say you take a scout troop to the local prison to meet the warden and talk about crime and punishment (hoping to scare the youth straight). The warden has a pistol. An escapee breaks in and shoots the warden. He then turns his gun on the scouts. How long do you wait before picking up the warden's gun to shoot the escapee? He said that he has friends who would never pick up the gun and that he can respect that belief.

As for me: if those close to me or I am threatened, I shoot first.

Update: I thought of more stuff he talked about.

7) State Attorney General Paul Summers was there. He didn't say anything though.

8) He stated that - at the Federal level - one is more likely to get the death penalty if you are white than Hispanic or Black. There are multiple reviews along the way and checks in the process. The Federal government provides for 2 attorneys for the accused. He said there were those arguing that more women should get the death penalty because over 90% of those who received the death penalty were men, that they should be proporinate to the population. [OK...] He thought that was just stupid because most of the crimes that merit the death penalty are committed by men.

Update #2: Here's the article in the Vanderbilt paper about it with some good quotes.

Recycling

From this week's Nashville Scene sex issue: Bondage Unmasked.

They talked about this before... in 1999.

Yes, this is a part of my deep dark past. About the same time, I spent time off and on at the dungeon described in the 1999 article. Didn't participate, however. It has been said that I would make a great professional dominatrix. That would mean I have to get over my utter distaste for submissive males. And... I just can't do that. Even if it meant making $100 an hour. Blech.

I may still have it but I have a draft of a post on the psychology of the submissive buried somewhere based off of Vox Day's random discussion of the Gor novels by John Norman a few months back. I may post it if I still have it.

Bet you didn't see that coming, huh? Heh.

Happy Birthday to the Blog

The Scratching Post is 3 years old today.

So very ancient.

In 3 years, I've attempted to cover politics, fashion, pop culture, Survivor and other reality TV shows, and the random crap I hear on the street.

Thanks for reading, y'all. I know there are many many places to hang out online. I'm thrilled that you spend part of your day here.

Your "Chicken Little" Report

Get ready, Nashville! The sky’s gonna fall...

My mom said this in an e-mail just now: “I have had the TV on local stations this morning, and one might get the idea that snow was the great earthquake of the century. The stations are breaking in on programming, scrolls ongoing. Better make sure that I have igloo-making supplies!”

And bread, milk, and eggs. Yes, all good Nashvillians know that you must rush out pronto and purchase these items as soon as the dreaded four-letter S-word raises its ugly head in a weather broadcast. Because nothin’ says lovin’ like French toast when you’re holed up in the house against the 2-inch snow accumulation…

I wonder if the local reporters will report live from the snow showers. “Yes, Demetria, I just talked to a snowflake, and the snow is apologizing for being a couple of hours late. They promise to show up right on Bill-Hall time the next go-round.”

Don't Be Modest

Elena sparked this post but it isn't her fault. We were doing one of the things we do best recently - shopping - and she said something about a shirt she liked and wearing it over another piece to make it more modest. I think I agreed with her because the scoop on the neckline was a little low to wear to the work-place but other than that, it was a cute top.

Now, before everyone has a heffer, I am not saying women should dress like skanky ho's. I don't need to see anybody's naughty bits... or a hint of their naughty bits. You have them. I have them. We all know this. Cover them up, please. And for crying out loud - it is WAY too cold for that short of a skirt.

What I am saying is that the word "modest" and attaching it to clothing makes me cringe. There is a whole modest-dressing movement that seems to wear turtle-necks and ankle-length skirts like a badge of honor. I've poked at them before (ladiesagainstfeminism.com is a personal favorite of mine when I need a good laugh - prarie rats.. er.. muffins.. of the future! Let's all dress up like Laura Engels! That will be so cool!).

Modest doesn't equal frumpy in just the same way fashionable doesn't equal almost naked.

Not... all... that... bright...

On my way to lunch yesterday, I happened across a group of students watching one of the campus hawks having lunch. Well, still killing his lunch - a big, fat squirrel.

This young lady was throwing rocks at the hawk because "the squirrel is still alive!"

PK wanted to say (but was sooooooooooo close to saying but didn't for fear of someone figuring out that I work in that building just down the way):

"What? Do you think pelting him with rocks is going to make him give up his meat eating ways and go vegan? That he will stop hunting and shop at Wild Oats instead? Have you stopped watching Style long enough to see what happens on the Discovery Channel? It is called the food chain, dear. Hawks and other birds of prey do us a favor by killing disease carrying rodents like rats and squirrels. Yes. Squirrels are rodents - they just have better outfits. If you don't like watching nature happen, keep walking."

Happy Baby!!!!

Erik of Emunda and SpunkyPunkyGirl just had their first baby, a son, last Thursday!

Yay! Congratulations and God bless!

The Super (Boring) Bowl

Phone coversation last night:

Elena: I can't believe I beat you to getting a post-game analysis up! You didn't even have a draft of something.
PK: Yeah. I was going to write something about how we came up with all this blog-worthy stuff during the game but didn't write it down so now I've forgotten it. But I decided that I wouldn't do that, because that's just cheesy.

This morning:

Call me Cheesy McCheese.

Really. The game didn't get good until sometime in the 3rd quarter. I was sitting there looking at my cookbooks, trying to decide which ones I was going to bring with me when I moved. And the commercials really weren't that good. I know---we probably expect too much. But dang, y'all!! Jessica Simpson singing her crappy-turd version of "These Boots Were Made for Walking" re-made into "These Bites Were Made for Poppin'" has permanently damaged my ears. I should sue.

Bueller? Didn't someone get the memo over there at Pizza Hut that the Dukes of Hazzard movie sucked? That doing something as a faux tie-in well after the movie bombed at the theater and came out on DVD is... well... you know... uh... so 5 minutes ago? Bueller? You're late.

We snacked. We viewed. I blogged it.

The Super Bowl adventures of PK, Duke Diva, and Elena found here

People should not be afraid of their governments....

Governments should be afraid of their people. - V for Vendetta (trailer from the Super Bowl).

It makes me all warm and fuzzy.

Announcement! One Ticket Available

Former Attorney General John Ashcroft will be speaking at VU on Feb. 13 (that's a Monday evening). The topis is the Death Penalty.

I have another ticket. Would anyone be interested in going? If so reply here (be sure to include an email address) or send me an email.

More information is available here.

Or you can get your own starting Monday.

Funny Signs

The guys at Team Swap found a uh... interesting Subway sign and have a caption contest going on.

Heh. Good find y'all.

Elena made a funny

Office Perfumes

Best Potential Captioning Photo Ever

I think this needs little introduction.... other than to say I laughed. I cried. I blogged it.

Encounters with Nature

Little more than a year ago, I reported that a pair of hawks had made the campus their winter hunting grounds... what with the ample supply of chipmunks and squirrels.

Since then, everyone talks about seeing one of them with a dead squirrel or eating a dead squirrel - how messy it was. I thought my last encounter was close. Well, yesterday it got closer. On my way to my car at the end of the day, I saw the hawk fly into a tree up ahead. I thought "cool! Maybe I can get a picture." So I get my camera phone out (of all days to leave my digital camera at home), hoping to get close enough that one could make out that there was a bird in the tree. Just as I got past the railing, the hawk swooped down and about 18 inches away from me... straight at a trio of squirrels on the tree to my left. She then flew back up and over another student and into the tree.

I watched her make 3 more attempts to get the squirrel before moving on. One of the faculty members walking by said "We should name them Peabody. Good riddence. They need to thin out the rodent population."

As Carrie Bradshaw said "You can't make friends with a squirrel. Squirrels are just rats with cuter outfits. "

Belly Dance Video Pick

The Belly Dance Superstars were on KTLA recently. Someone captured their appearence and put it on the web. Unfortunately, the file is massive. It took a minute to DL on my industrial-grade connection here at work.

If you do watch it, the dancers in order are Bozenka (who is trying a little too hard to look like Jillina now that she's dyed her hair red), Rachel Brice (*squeal!!!!* GAWD she's amazing!), Petite Jamilla, and Sonia with Issam.

For the Nashville folk, BDSS will be in town on Saturday, February 18th at the Belcourt. They will be appearing at 2pm at Borders on West End for a signing of the new Solos from Monaco dvd as well as other merch and photo taking opportunities. I won't be there because I will be at the Sonia and Issam workshop. That weekend is very much PK's all bellydance-all the time weekend. Heh.

If you want to see them in your city, check the BDSS calendar.

Adventures in Rubbernecking

On my way home from the store yesterday, traffic was really bad. It's a Sunday.. it's not raining. It's actually very pretty. What could be going on?

There was a wreck.

OK... I can handle that. It's in the left lane. People are having to merge to the right to get out of the way.

Well... about 50 feet further, in the right lane, there is another wreck. Why? Because people were looking up the hill at the apartment complex where a Nashville fire truck was flashing its lights and had its ladder extended for something. Would I have been looking if I were actually moving? No. I saw it because I was at a dead stop waiting for the people in front of me to merge.

Incident #2: Monday morning. 21st ave S. There is a woman holding a large particle board sign that she holds to hide most of her face.. sort of an industrial grade veil. On it, she has the following statement "ID Theft Covered by Law Officials."

Dance is Life

Elena suggested that I do another 'dance is life' post. I am not sure I've done one previously and I'm not sure what she wants to see out of it.. but perhaps she just wants me to talk about it to other people and not only her (just teasin' you, sweetie).

This past weekend, I went to my first ballroom dance competition. One of the owner's of the studio where I take lessons and his former competitive partner performed in a couple of exhibitions. They are former US champions (3-time US champions in American Smooth). Last Friday night, they did a waltz-based program. I wish I could put into words what I saw. Just thinking about it makes me all teary. Etheral is the best word I can think of. It was dance as languange and pure emotion.

I listen to some people say that they just have to dance or else they will burst. I'm never sure what to make of their statement. Personally, I think they are weird. I love dance. But I won't die if I don't. Upset? Sorely unhappy? Quite possibly. I'll die if I don't breathe or eat or drink water. I won't even die for lack of sleep unless I happen to be in a car, pass out and crash.

Perhaps it is because I've never felt that burning desire to create something. Dance to me is an expression of emotion. For example, I had a conversation with someone recently that left me in such a mood that I was giddy to the point of being insanely goofy. All the way home, I listened to one of my favorite belly dance CDs and sang along as best I could (though I really don't know what they are saying). I got home, put on my headphones and mp3 player and danced for about 15 minutes, expressing the joy I had after this conversation. Then I got to my regularly scheduled dance lesson and my instructor must have thought "what is with this girl?" because I couldn't stop grinning or giggling for no apparent reason.

Dance isn't life. Dance is a form of communication. It is a language. It conveys an emotion, an idea, and an image. Not everyone gets it. And that's ok.

The show everyone else is talking about

but I have yet to watch.... so I'm going to take a silly little quiz about it and wind up being a character I'm not familiar with at all.


Nina Myers


Which 24 Character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

The Puffy Shirt, Part Deux

I saw this item in a popular chain bookstore the other night and nearly frightened the clerk with my squeal. I could make PK the proud owner of a carefully-enshrined-in-a-blister-pack male-fashion-doll-sized Puffy Shirt!! I thought.

I got the clerk to pull the box off the shelf behind her, and she informed me that sadly, I must purchase the Seinfeld Seasons 5 & 6 DVDs in order to get the Puffy Shirt.

Dag, yo.

$80.00 for an eeny-weeny Puffy Shirt. Uh-unh....I don't think so.


Yes, folks, you can purchase a Puffy Shirt for your Ken doll, but.......should you?

I'm just sayin' .......

The Most Important Question I've Found Yet

Fishkite asks about soft drinks and The choice of a binary generation

Blessings

This is a random thought but... it's good.

I got to thinking about the fact that my parents and grandparents are gone the other day. It was the first time in a long time I cried about it, particularly for my dad. I can't recall crying over his passing. Maybe I have at some point. I don't remember.

Jehovah-Jireh - God does provide.

I lost my mom but have gained 2 more - a lady at church and a lady at work. They both say to me every now and then "If I may be a mother for a moment..." and they are so supportative and loving.

I lost my dad but God sent a man that is more like a dad than my biological father was. I've unofficially become his 4th daughter.

I've gained another family though my brother's fiancee' (he proposed 2 weeks ago!). It has taken a long time but both my brother and I finally relax around them - not fearing the guilt trips, reprisals, and anger that would come with our blood family gatherings.

It feels good.

Understatement of the Year

Realtor (responding to voice mail left yesterday - she returned a phone call! Hell froze over!): Pink Kitty, I could tell from your message that you were frustrated and irritated.

Pink Kitty's response upon hearing this message: Give you a gold star for observation! What could have possibly clued you in? Geez!

No, I didn't actually say this. I'm still not up to actually speaking to her. We are using voice mail to communicate.

Elena has been writing again v. 2

Polka-dotted Sky

Question...

Does anyone know how I can fire my real estate agent (because she is an incompetant idiot who has decided she no longer has to work for the commission) and not give her a commission.. AND keep the condo I want to buy?

This is my own fault - I didn't go through my previous realtor. He's a good agent. This lady is the freak who sits in the model all day who apparently can't get clients on her own. I was so thrilled to be getting an end unit, I let that cloud my judgement. But that doesn't excuse her for not returning my infrequent calls or answering my simple questions (like "how big is the central heat/air unit? It looks like it is a 1.5 ton unit, which would be large enough for the space but could you check on that?")

But I've had it and she hasn't done a freakin' thing to earn her commission. And I found out that yes I can fire her but she still gets her commission. WHAT THE HE** KIND OF RACKET IS THAT!?!?! You can be fired for being a bad agent and STILL make money?! She doesn't deserve any of my money. Anybody have any advice on what I should do?

More Fun with the News2 Scrolly Thing

It's Friday isn't it? Click on the images to see the whole thing.

I lost Smith and Wesson...

Not literally. They are at home.. probably asleep in the laundry. Or climbing into a box on the top shelf that makes you wonder "How in the heck did he get up there?!"

Weight-wise.

I think I told y'all that I have been meeting with a nutritionist and that I met my weight loss goal for 2005. That was through a combination of working on my own (-15 lbs) and weight management program(-15 lbs).

When I started this program in November, we set a goal for the 3 month program of 20 lbs. For those that have trouble with math, like me. For 2006, I've lost 5 lbs thus far.

Now - in just around 2 months, I've met that goal and down 35 lbs from my heaviest just under a year ago.

It is nearly impossible to put into words what that feels like for me. My cats weigh about 10 lbs each. I lost Smith and Wesson. Wow. Yep. It's a good day.

No, No, a Thousand Times No

Via NIT, I saw this post about the puffy shirt.

OK, so Gerard Butler looked good in The Phantom of the Opera, but I don't think I was near-drooling because of "the Puffy Shirt." Seriously. The guy is smokin' and looked really good in leather in Lara Croft: Cradle of Life. Too bad he had to die. That just sucked.

Anyway, here is a major example of what not to wear... the puffy shirt:



Update: Elena sent the picture to me.

Caption Contest Winner

Always funny, as usual. Very creative... it gets to be a hard decision sometimes, you know. But the winner is:

Digital Cowboy with:

"George! George!

Stop that! You're old enough to know better and I'm tired of telling you!"

Congrats!

Shopping!

Shop CD Baby - the best in independent music. I love everything I've purchased from them. They are having a big ol' honkin' sale.

$5 Specials

Put 3 or more of the CDs on the sale page and they will be discounted to $5 a piece. Shipping is reasonable, too. Get there and get some.

Full disclosure: I don't get a kickback. I say it because I love them. And I'm a girl - genetically wired to shop and find sales.

*sighs*

I'm a few days late with this. Not that anyone will really care.

So it seems that the campus is all aflutter that The Bachelor happens to work here (I know somebody over in ER... I should ask her about him. She told me the whole scoop when TLC did its show about the residents here - that one girl wasn't as ditzy as she was on camera but because she was shown in a spaced out moment, no patients wanted anything to do with her).

Anyway, via Brittney via Heather, I poked around the show's website and became amused with the facts that:

1) Almost every girl wanted someone tall, dark and handsome (one even had a height requirement and 2 said "perfect teeth")
2) 3 girls described their perfect date which included a private jet trip somewhere

My favorite profile - Yvonne:

Hometown: Miami, FL
Age: 28

My three best attributes: Compassionate, dedicated, assertive
My perfect date would be: Being with someone who did nothing to annoy me
My ideal mate is: Tall, lean with dark hair, witty, open and lets me be the center of attention

She's also a CFO. Kudos on her accomplishments. Something about her picture says "I eat testicles for breakfast"... maybe that is just me. Granted, I want to be with someone who doesn't annoy me but I think her attempt to be funny completely back fired. She comes across as self-absorbed (uh... wait... there's that whole being the center of attention thing).

Thus ends all that I really have to say about The Bachelor.

What I did Saturday

Defensive Driver Training...

- or -

First Offenders Class

I ran a stop sign a while back (well, technically it was a rolling slow. The officer didn't agree with me on that fact). Since it was my first ticket, I opted to go waste a Saturday morning and have the thing expunged from my record by sitting in a driver's training class. Here's the gist:

1) Pay attention to the road and not your cell/kids/radio/cute person in next car/hamburger/makeup/etc....
2) Slow down - you drive too fast.

We could have handled that in 10 minutes but now... 2 hours of listening to a very nice little woman with a Latin American accent talk about collisions and death on the road was near enthralling *cough cough*. Then there was the the 1992-era video with what's his name from Coach and a bunch of other people that I'm sure were the bomb in the early 90's but are now relegated to Trival Pursuit pop-culture edition questions.

Am I a better driver? Eh. I am leaving more distance between my car and the one in front of me.. and I use my turn signal. Can that be considered an improvement?

Candy

I got a hazelnut truffle from one of the girls at work. It had this little wrapper on the inside of the foil wrapper. Written on it, in multiple languages, is the following:

Woman: You don't understand me!
Man: What do you mean?

PK *staring at the wrapper, looking all sorts of confused* thinks: Does this bad acting on this piece of wax paper make the chocolate taste bad? Nope. It doesn't. Yummmmm...

New Year, New Caption Contest

I think this needs little introduction....



Note: As always, please keep your captions safe for work. Thanks!

It fell into a burning Ring of Fire

Since Johnny Cash is no longer Stayin' Alive (none of us can have Immortality), the estate had to do something with his home.

Making us Cry, Cry, Cry is the fact that Bee Gees’ Barry Gibb buys the Cash home. Mr. Gibb probably sees is bit differently seeing it as Too Much of Heaven. He will likely change it One Piece at a Time and live there Until The Man Comes Around.

(thanks Miss O'Hara!)

Today's Funny Word

Garanimals

Belated Christmas Funny

I'm a little late with this, but here's what the 12 Days of Christmas would look like if it were found on eBay.

Happy New Year - almost

I've been remiss about posting this week but I think that is largely because I can't think of anything to say.

I decided to not really use my Palm anymore. I've gone back to analog. I love the Moleskine notebooks I use for dance so much that I bought the 2006 Moleskine daily planner. I like it. It is actually alot easier to use than my Palm.

I could whine about how I got sick overnight but even I don't want to hear that. The only reason I came into work today was because of a lunch our boss is buying for us.

Wesson went to the vet last night. It was the first time he and Smith were parted since I brought them home. They were both out of sorts last night. Wesson is fine for any who might worry. Of course, he was the hit of the evening because he is so sweet, loving and gosh-darn cute. They all raved about his bright gold eyes.

A couple months ago I started working with a nutrionist about the same time I got serious about dancing. I've been the fat-chick most of my life and I am tired of living this way. So I've been watching what I eat and exercising more (as the Dr. who supervises the program said - 'Losing weight is a very simple concept. Eat fewer calories. Exercise more. Actually doing it is the hardest thing you will probably ever do') or something like that. I set a goal for myself over the summer to be down 30 lbs by the end of the year.

I achieved that yesterday. Hooray for me! I noticed last night my neck is actually getting more slender and doesn't look so much like a football player. It all feels good.

I still have a long way to go but the mini-goals are much more doable than saying "I need to lose 100 lbs." Yeah - I know that but looking at it in that way is trying to hike the Applachian Trail in 2 days. It can't be done. Saying "I want to lose 20 lbs over the next 3 months" is much more realistic, safe, and doable.

Here's to 2006. May your New Year be blessed, safe, joyful, and happy.

Love all y'all!

Clucking Along

Chris Wage thinks I am a chicken. Last I checked, I wasn't. But I suppose I'll take chicken over some various other names I could be called.

Res, keep your 9th grade mind out of here. ;)

I am working on a response to his response to my anti-unions post.

It will take some time for me to finish up the research. Scholarly articles take a long time for my poor-little-brain to process.

Meanwhile, Difster (aka Captain Obvious), Res, and Erik have some good points on unions in the comments thread.

Christmas Songs I Love

Per Elena's request (who has said that I've been very Grinch-y this year; yes, I'm being a Grinch), here are the Christmas songs I love. Newton also has a list of his favorite songs.

O Come, O Come, Emmanuel
This one one of the first songs I learned when I was in chorus in High School. It was in our repertoire for four years. I didn't get it until I became a Christian. Katherine posted the lyrics on her blog a couple of weeks ago, and I cried like a baby.

Just thinking about it makes me weepy. I can still hear the bass section opening the song - so strong and clear.

O Holy Night
I love this song for a lot of the same reasons I love "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel." They kinda quickly get to the point of Christmas: celebration of Jesus' birth. I think about the shepherds who were greeted by an angel of the Lord - how terrifying and awesome that must have been.

That may also be part of my Grinch-y behavior this year: I'm sick of the commercialization. I'm sick of the cult-of-shopping. The debate over "happy holidays" versus "Merry Christmas" just annoys me to no end. Shut up already and pick one!


These songs also have not been beaten to death by celebrity Christmas albums.


I am seriously considering returning the gifts I bought and just donating the money in everyone's name to a charity where it will do some good. Truthfully, do we need more stuff?


Carol of the Bells (though I prefer the instrumental versions of this song) It sounds really cool and that's why I like it.

Anything by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. They rock.

The Charlie Brown Christmas CD

You dance too much when....

you are at the mall and a song comes on with a cha-cha beat (1-2-'cha-cha-cha').. and your feet automatically start moving.

And you are three patterns in before you even realize you are dancing.

Oh yes, this happened to me. And I was in the middle of a spot turn when I realized what I was doing. I had to just say to myself over and over "NO - NO DANCING IN THE STORE!!!"

So I made it through the cha-cha. The next song was a Middle Eastern piece that was perfect for belly dancing. Again with the hips! There they go! Figure 8's just start without a thought. At that point, I left the store before I made too big a fool of myself.

More on the Power to destroy

"Transit workers are tired of being underappreciated and disrespected." - Union President Roger Toussaint in announcing the NYC Transit Workers strike.

And you think angering 7 million potential commuters is going to get you more respect and appreciation?

The union said the latest MTA offer included annual raises of 3 percent, 4 percent and 3.5 percent; the previous proposal included 3 percent raises each year. MTA workers earn between $47,000 and $55,000 annually. The MTA originally had demanded an 8 percent pay raise per year for their members.

Pension issues have been a major sticking point in the talks. The MTA wants to raise the age at which new employees become eligible for full pensions from 55 to 62, which the union says is unfair.

But Toussaint said the union wanted a better offer from the MTA, especially when the agency has a $1 billion surplus this year.

I would like to work in a job where I'm guarenteed a 4% pay increase every year. I will count myself blessed to get a 2% raise. And I would also like to retire with full benefits at 55 - still young enough to get out there and really explore and savor life.

There's a surplus this year. Wouldn't upgrading equipment be useful - more fuel efficent vehicles for example? How about setting some of it aside in case there are years when there isn't a budget surplus? What about using it to lower prices for the riders? Huh?

GEEZ - our entire society is acting like a 5 year old with a buck in his pocket. It's burning and it must be spent - NOW!!!!!

Playing like a broken record

I've said it before and I will say it again: the power to tax is the power to destroy.

And it is the power to use bunker-buster bombs when big government gets into bed with unions. It is a must-read article. Don't hold any illusions that tax payers have any say what-so-ever.

Don't pay your income tax, the IRS will put you in jail.
Don't pay your property tax, the city will confiscate your property.

Nothing is yours anymore. I think I want to find out how to live off the grid.

Overheard at Lunch

Guy: Did he have a gross peter?
Girl: No, he didn't.

PK's thought: Well, I think I'm going to skip the roll portion of my meal and enjoy the non-phallic things on my plate.

They then went on to talk about all the people they knew in the mob. Like her uncle and a friend of a friend of his who is supposed the grandson of the guy who the Godfather is based off of.

From the Ministry of the Obvious

Cell Phones Interfere with Family Life

Because if you talking to someone on the line about what he did to you last night 'Oh no he di-n't!' how can you pay attention to the person right across from you? It is one thing to take a call and be brief about it. But it is quite another to conduct a 20 minute conversation about... uh... what's the strangest cell phone conversation you've heard?

The next time you are subjected to an obnoxious cell phone user, give them one of these cards from the Society for HandHeld Hushing. Free to download and fully customizable for any conversation.

And for the bad drivers of the world, use these Road Rage Cards. (Not safe for work)

Insanity:

Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
- Albert Einstein

Need proof? See Congress and the US Treasury Department's latest scheme: New dollar coins to feature dead presidents

Because the Susan B. Anthony and Sacagawea dollar coins were so popular....

You are mean one, Mr. Grinch

You really are a heel.
You're as cuddly as a cactus,
You're as charming as an eel.
Mr. Grinch.

You're a bad banana
With a greasy black peel.

(pops to full size)

Christmas Puppy Goodness

It isn't my puppy. Miss O'Hara sent me a link to a Detroit Knottie (that would be a fellow member of theknot.com wedding message board) snapfish account.

But it is too cute not to share:

Smokin'

I don't smoke. In fact, I'm allergic to cigarette smoke. It pretty much gives me an instant headache. It is such that I can smell a cigarette when it has been tossed out of a nearby car. The friends I have who do smoke are very courteous about it. They try to stand down wind or sit further from me at the table.

It's why I don't do the downtown bar/club scene. The thought of coming home and smelling like an ashtray just isn't appealing. I would like to go out but many places aren't smoke free or they don't have a place for non-smokers. The one time I attempted to visit Legend's, I wound up sitting on a bench outside.

Oddly, pipes and cigars don't bother me. When I've gone to Sherlock Holmes Pub, I've been around a number of pipe smokers and haven't been sick at all.

A business aquaintence from Boston told me he was surprised that Nashville didn't have more non-smoking restaurants or areas of restaurants. Boston is smoke-free. All restaurants and bars are smoke free. I've not done the research but it makes sense to me. He said that he and his friends now go out more often because it is smoke free. Restaurants and bars protested initally but the complaining eventually went away because profits didn't decrease (according to his opinion).

Since there are more non-smokers than smokers, it would stand to reason that there are people (like myself) avoiding businesses because of smoke. I believe that they would actually go out more often if they knew they weren't going to get sick from the experience.

All of this to say, the Nashville Scene had a story about it. The good libertarian in me says let the businesses (or at the very least cities) decide for themselves what is/isn't smoke free. But boy, it would be great to visit Legend's and not sit on the street corner the whole night.

What's in Season

I get a little frustrated when I hear the phrase from snooty chefs on Food Network say that I should buy "what's in season."

"What IS in season you dolt?! Not all of us have that information or know where to go get it." I knew eggplants were in season in the summer from the Alton Brown "Good Eats" episode on eggplant.

When I go to the store, the produce looks pretty good. I buy it. I'm not paying too much attention to prices from June to now.

Apparently, Food Network heard me screaming, and they now have a handy-dandy guide to what is in season.

Finally declaring a winner

I've finally gotten around to it. I'm picking a winner in the last caption contest with the Pelosi Pic. Drumroll please.....

Steve with: "OOoooo...so that's how a Republican hangs. Dems are so tiny."

Because size comparison jokes are funny.

Bridal Caption Things

Miss O'Hara is getting married in April and being a bridesmaid, I get to help with all sorts of wedding things. From a distance anyway since we live in different cities.

Miss O'Hara is NOT a bridezilla. She has been fabulous and wonderfully accomodating and gracious. And helpful in pointing out the horrible things in bridal trends.

Like this, for those that can't be bothered to hold a bouquet:



And Elena found this one and sent a caption of "His boutinerre is REALLY happy to see the bride":



Then there are the shoes (not bridal but they deserve to be made fun of anyway. We found these while trying to find some good shoes to go with the dresses):

Miss O'Hara said these were "for the yak solidaritist"


I said these were for the corset fan in your life. They may also work for Pochantas if she needs something dressier for a night on the town:

My Booth Would Be So Much Cooler

Brevity Comic... that's because all the bloggers I know are cool. Except Difster. He's Captain Obvious.

All I want for Christmas

My own personal tank. Except that it needs some kind of gun mounted on it. I mean, what's the point of having a tank if you can't shoot at anything?

Does it scream "Jawa Transport Vehicle" to you? It does to me. With Smith's and Wesson's beady yellow eyes looking Jawa-like.... yeah - I'm ready for Tatooine, baby!

Christmas Songs I Hate

Away in a Manger

I can't stand this song because of the fact that it is so.. so.. Thomas Kincade in its depiction of the Nativity. The whole cattle lowing but the baby isn't crying thing just seems so un-realistic to the point of irritating.

Twelve Days of Christmas

Much like 99 bottles of beer on the wall, this song just keeps going on and on. It launches into the realm of annoying about the time you get to 3 French Hens. Now I know it is supposed to be spiritually significant but honestly, when you were taught the song, did they tell you that 3 French Hens represented "Faith, Hope, and Love?" I went to Church of Christ and Baptist schools. Never mentioned. Maybe it is a Catholic thing.

White Christmas

I am about to commit Christmas blasphemy: I don't care for White Christmas and I can't stand "It's a Wonderful Life." Being from the South, we don't have white Christmases. It's hard to share in that sentimentality (much like the mushy Amy Grant song 'Tennessee Christmas'). I think my problem with this and Grant's song is that it creates an ideal that just can't be met in the real world.

It is as though you are looking through a semi-foggy window at the ULTIMATE Christmas scene. Large family gathered around an expansive table with a turkey the size of a small child. Side dishes to make your eyes pop. Everyone wearing sweaters and other holiday-appropriate gear. Children running around, playing. It's just lovely and peaceful. Everything is ready on time and perfectly cooked. There's no TV playing the background. No one is eating in the den off of TV trays. The house is tastefully decorated with a large live Christmas tree. Did I mention the ribbons?

Yeah. I hate that. If anyone actually experienced a Hallmark-style holiday, I'm not sure I want to hear about it.

The Wonder Twins

Here are a couple of pictures of my boys: Smith and Wesson.

Loaded as a Logan's Baked Potato

Check this out:

Jennifer Pizer, a lawyer for the gay rights group Lambda Legal Defence, said the case was the first in the US to allow a gay man or lesbian to sue doctors on allegations that treatment had been denied because of sexual orientation. The case has still to reach trial.

She said the latest ruling would be appealed against at the California supreme court. "We fear this decision is going to worsen the confusion in the minds of the public about whether you can legally discriminate in the name of religion," Ms Pizer, who represents Ms Benitez, told Associated Press. "The bottom line is that you should not be able to treat patients in a discriminatory way."

What treatment was she being denied? Fertility treatment. Now, last I checked, fertility treatment was not a life or death issue. It isn't cardiac care. She isn't going to die if she doesn't have a baby.

The court ruled in favor of the doctors, by the way, who refused to treat her on religious grounds.

Since fertility treatments are optional and one can have a good quality of life without them, I agree with the doctors. Maybe she should try another doctor, hmm? It is a free market economy, you know. She did that anyway, and has a 3 year old.

If they were refusing to, say, go through with a liver transplant even though there was a qualified donor and all because she was a lesbian, then I would agree with Lambda. Denial of critical care based on gender, orientation, intelligence level, income, race, or political persuasion is wrong.

Guest Blogging Stint

This weekend, I will be holding down the fort at NashvilleIsTalking.com.

So, let's head over there, mm-kay?

Caption Contest of the Third Kind

Holy Freakin' Crap... what a screen capture of Nancy Pelosi. Many thanks to the lovely and talented Miss O'Hara for pointing it out to me or else I would have missed it.

Have fun!

Elena has been writing again

Someone finally got around to adding something to her blog. :)

She has a great post on Walk the Line. There are some good observations in there. Go check it out.